this is just me plain and simple. its just my online diary. i dont write it for any one else, i write it for me.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

God

iv found it harder and harder lately to believe in god. not that he is there, iv seen to much to not believe that he is there. but iv found it hard to believe that he actually cares what happens to me. he has been silent of late. and yea i know every one says god doesn't move you do (and some where in the back of my mind i know that). it seems like god has abandon me mid plan. I'm crying out to god and he is sitting there silent. do you care any more god? did u ever care? were all your promises lies? you never speak to me so why should i speak to you? if you love me so much than why do you leave me like this? iv never expected things to be easy but u said you would help me through all this or did i just think you said that? maybe your just a liar like everyone else. so if you care why don't you prove it oh powerful god!
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1 comment:

  1. tiffanieApril 5, 2010 at 6:40 AM

    kaitlyn - first of all, i love you love you love you love you! second of all, i've felt the same way and thought the same things as a lot of your posts. as recently as the last few months. you're not alone. and you're not wrong for having feelings of pain and sadness and frustration. God would rather you come to him screaming and yelling than walk away and not talk to him at all. he wants to engage in conversation with you. now, does that mean that you'll "feel" his presence everytime you pray? nope, sorry. i don't. but it is true that he is there even if you can't feel him.

    here's a book that i loved (remember how i hate reading!?): The Folly of Prayer by Matt Woodley. you can borrow my copy if you'd like. i bet you could read it in like a day or two. it's really great. i loved it. it's about the times in life when you feel like God is silent. and there are those times. sometimes it's because you're moving further from God, but sometimes, it's just a quiet time. it's time for you to remember what God has done for you and let that be what you hold on to. He's using every experience in your life to teach you something - this time included.

    love, tiffanie

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