youth convention

OK so youth convention was great. god just spoke so clearly to my heart. before youth convention i was seriously doubting if god ever cared about me but youth convention just confirmed in my heart that he did. the first night was probably the most powerful to me, Johnny Wilson (i don't think I'm spelling his name right)talked about how we don't think we are worthy of talking to god. iv never thought that i was worthy to talk to god i always thought i was too idk wretched to talk to him. some times i would pray to god that i would think of my self as worthy of him and than immediately i would change my prayer because i didn't think i should think of myself as worthy. when johnny reminded me that we are god's children it just hit me. it seemed so simple but it was such a big epiphany to me. I'm gods daughter and a daughter never wonders if they are worthy to go to their father. i was at the alter just crying about about how i so want to see my self as worthy of god and then johnny said something that hit me even harder. he said for all the people who have just always felt broken to raise their hand. that is exactly how i have always felt, i just always described my self as broken. most of the time i didn't even know why i felt so broken but the pain of it would turn me inside out and bring me to my knees. i still dont know why i feel broken (and yes i say feel present tense) but i am now continually praying that god will make me feel whole. that was an awesome night. and both nights god just pushed the point that i should be searching after him, that some times god comes after me but other times i need to go after him. i just love god so much i hope that this feel will last and i hope that i will continue to chase after him.